Welcome, welcome, welcome!
What's all this about scamming?
So first of all, can I say thanks for checking my website out, I really appreciate it!
I'm just a guy who loves Warhammer and 40K, and I post videos and do live streams on my YouTube channel about this fantastic hobby!
Over the last few years we have created an amazing community, and as I always say, the best community anyone could wish for. We live for the banter, and my (often) nightly streams truly are fun filled events!
But the Scams?
Over time we have created memes and banter related to the hobby and community, and for some reason, the Scam thing just came about organically, I promise!... (my lawyer says to say: I can neither confirm nor deny... ;-) ) so please take anything scam related on this website as light hearted banter, with a pinch of salt, and in the tongue-and-cheek way it is meant!
We're here to have fun, and if I can make a few people smile and enjoy their day just a little bit more, then I've achieved something worthwhile.
Please join the ride, come and watch a stream or two, and if you like what I do, consider joining the community through Discord by becoming a member on YouTube and linking your youtube account to discord, instructions here.
See you on the stream!
The wall of Scams, it's Free Real Estate
Behold, The Wall of Martyrs
This is where the simps mighty are held aloft, their shining presence a beacon to the greys lesser mortals who could only hope to be come as pious as they, displayed and revered so...
...on the wall of Scams Martyrs.
In no particular order... (Latest simps first)
Inner Circle Seal Holders
Brother Templar Chris
I am the shield that guards the realms of men. I pledge my life and honour to the Emperor, for this day and all the days to come.
Frederik Holmgren
I need to get rid of this addiction of watching your streams ... must be my new years resolution. :) Still blaming poor Wood Imp for your lack of a survey video?
Mr. Stamper
Victory is achieved through mettle. Glory is achieved through metal.
JawaDem1390
I've been SCAMMED !! Just joking seriously valrak love all the content you put out and all the live streams Keep up the amazing work LONG LIVE CHAPTER MASTER VALRAK !!
Calavera 13
May your fistings be righteous in the depths of the Emperor's void station
Benny
It's nice to take a break from reality and just tune in to your channel every now and again. I've said it before, it's like listening to a friend who won't shut up about 40k and that's exactly what I like. Take care and I will continue to serve you as captain for a bit longer.
Chapter Master Joice
Your Scams are no match for my mighty Fist
Novacaine
Balls for the balls god
Bauer
Emperor bless Chapter Master Valrak for his unwavering support of the Imperium and its blessed warriors. Thank you for all you do for the glory of the Imperium.
Song of Power
"Oh your father! Yes, he was very strange" Malcador telling Dorn with a zesty smile. “He's done some questionable things, very strange, yes, very very strange… OH! But he was Good!” Then the Slaaneshi-itch fell upon Dorn.
Jadmurdoch
Long story short we lost both mine and my brother's dogs within a few weeks through old age and sudden illness, was a tough time looking after them but your regular streams really helped take my mind off things. Thank you :) keep on scammin' ;) o7 ♡ Evie & Kenye
Clearance clearwater
What kind of Warhammer channel has raucous banter and hundreds of people gambling at 2am? --- The best damn Warhammer channel in town!
Genosse Macerino
"In the Emperor's service, the Death Korps will pay any price." — Lord Marshall Arnim Kagori
PawMaster Hamish LuperCat
WHOOO!!!?? Where's that Iron Warrior tattoo then? RISE UP! DOUBLE MARBLES!
Victoria The Infinite
The absolute best and generous mod that there ever did live.
The Fallen & Unforgiven
### --- By the order of the imperial Regent, the imperial fists are officially labelled as Heretic traitoris and Dorn is DEAD!!!! Dorn has been located entertaining Khorne after 1st Black Crusade --- ####
Gregg Askey
Much Love brother. I am proud of you
Valkorion
We the red clad. We the blood hungry. We the wrathful & the pure. We are the sons of Sanginius!
James Workshop
Don't forget our arrangement. We will be watching
Hokum
NEVER BACK DOWN, NEVER SURRENDER!
CeeJay
From shame and shadow recast, in black and gold reborn, we have returned. DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR!
Pezler the Poly chromatic
Dune stole their ideas from Warhammer 40K........ ..........got 'em.
Henry Cavill
Dearest Chapter Master Valrak (if that is your real name), I have told you repeatedly to stop sending me DMs and your hand written messages in my garden. Those pictures are quite inappropriate, the filled jars, and canal pictures need to stop. Please respect the restraining order. Cheers ( you disgust me)
Nick Fury
Please help me, I’m trapped in Valraks basement, this is the only way I could call for help
G.H-B
Salute to my British brother in arms - may you purge xenos in the Emperors name for all eternity!
The White Lycan
I have never met a more kind and honorable individual than Chapter Master Valrak. Your dedication and generosity inspire all of us, and I truly appreciate everything you do for our community. Long may you continue to shine in glory!
Iron Thane
Praise be onto the Omnissiah and the God-Emperor!
Tyberos the Red Wake says...
Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Baby shark! From JudasPainting
Evilestkhan
Wolf of the Allfarther, Wolf of all friends.
Bjorn The Fell-Handed
As much as we all take the piss outa ya. You are a shining beacon in the 40k community for others to follow your example.
POPEYE
From the halls of hell storm games to tables of warhammer world your lies and deception know no bounds. PAINT YOUR OWN MODELS FOR ONCE AND WIN A ACTUAL TITAN BATTLE.
British grid iron films
We Herby commit the Scam to the wall, Circle within Circle, Lion to lying , leak to leak. in sure and certain hope of the resurrection of the emperor and Valrak to eternal blacklisting.
Gizmo
Father, why do you call me Archemis? You know my name is Gizmo. Please, Father, please, brush your teeth before kissing me on the mouth again. Also, I would appreciate you not petting me so hard...there.
Chapter Master Wood
When do these ship? I can't wait to hang it up in my office!
Bandit
This purity seal is proof the the Ultramarines are the best chapter, Way better than those Imperial loosers with a dead primarch.
PizzaProphet
God knows why ive been here so long been a ride mate also Australia valfest when
Limited Time AK
We're not the chapter you need. We are the chapter you deserve.
Warhammer Heresy
Mortarion redemption loading!
Wood Imp
Through void and flame, on steel-clad wings, We serve the Emperor, King of Kings. His wrath our creed, His name our vow, In blood and thunder, we fight here now. So heed our words, ye warriors true, For battles fresh, and lore anew, Join us now, where legends brew— Subscribe to Wood Imp, as warriors do!
AJ
For Dorn!
Java
Chapter master Valrak Master of lies and deception The boat story never gets old. The SM2 spoiler was amazing. Leaked Dante like a boss. He has an arse like a bushveld rain frog, i should know, ive seen it.
Sabian wilson
In the name of emperor and holy father of Jesus Christ we serve the mighty Chapter Master to led us to victory but to protect the family's and loved ones that we lost in the years and served with. In Rogal Dorns name countless generations have stood vigil
Emperors Champion Pudsey
Go fourth my fellow son of Dorn and triumph against all odds as we both know you will. for we are sons of Dorn We Are the imperium in the name of the God emperor purge cleanse and destroy all No pity! No remorse! No fear!
Scumb4g Kustoms
Thank you for your support, wouldn't have made it this far without you!
Vanquisher of Havoc
Their is a Valrak within us all.
real person you can trust me
We've been trying to reach you about your automobile warranty.
Grimpo96
Hydra Dominatus 2: Acidic Boogaloo
Haxx
This man is a professional scammer. He still owes me a survey voucher.
Mr. Morden
Salamanders are S tier. This official seal from Valrak, Chaos God of Scams, makes it official. #VulkanLives
I Eat Genestealer Ass
No brother left behind, no ass left un-ate
Cole Friel, Scion of Malakim Phoros
For those we cherish, we die in glory! The Emperor protects, always
GOD CONVOY
Chapter Master Valrak has scammed me out of my home and stole my dog. He pooped himself afterwards.
Ryan El'Johnson
The measure of true glory is not to give battle in the bright noon of war, surrounded by brave comrades upon the field of victory, but to valiantly fight on alone in the darkness, with no hope of aid or even remembrance, and to spit defiance in midnight's eye
IKJ-Caboose
Eternally scammed
_Syddraf
Loyalty is its own Reward
Keith Barrett
From plague, deceit, temptation and war, Our Emperor, deliver us
Bob Holsomback
Thanks for getting me back in the hobby after my wife passed away.
Dakka
Java smells like pigeons and Sugarpuffs
Raelyn Castivar (SaltyOps)
By the Blood of the Great Angel are we sustained in our Rage, our Fury and our Righteousness. For the Emperor and Sanguinius!
Jeffery berkness
For the emperor I will march to my death. For russ I charge my enemies.
Gregory Dillon
Into the fires of battle, unto the anvil of war!
Kahl Me Maybe
Val it’s been a pleasure watching you the last few years since i found you. Cheers to the future!
Wayward Herald
Chapter Master Valrak the true genefather of the Blood Ravens! no matter what he says, the Iron Cage happened
BIGGUS DICKUS
I DEMAND AN APOLOGY VIDEO! THIS IS THE WORST ONLY FANS SITE I'VE EVER SEEN!
Bellum
We remember those scammed by Valrak.
Prince Vultan Hawklord
I came for the scams, I left learning of the great canal pusher, lord of the falling off the roof at least he has Bentley and an NDA much love to you Val.
MAclain Holland
Thanks Valrak for RIGGING the 10th Edition Boxset giveaway so I got it for free and sent to the USA. Gifted Greens for the ultimate SCAM.
Colin The Saiyan
Trust an Ultramarine to handle your Commercial Real Estate needs, Fields@Westmac.com
Marco Polo
I am the knightest knight player and youll kneel before my mighty knight to all who stands before me
gwick
Blessed is the mind too small for scams
Mrs. Bubbles
In the embrace of great Chapter Master Valrak, I am no longer afraid, for with His Drama, Scams and Marbles filled favor, I have become that which I once feared: A Sexy Simp."
Luminaric Steel
Honor and Glory! Greetings from the Radiant Drakes Chapter and Chapter Master Luminairc. Vulkan Lives!
Corey McKemy
There's no way you have the proof that you scammed me out of $20. FOR THE LION!
D Doyle
Honoured member of the Upperhive
Hugo M.
Into the foil of battle, unto the Anvil of Scams!
DreamScape
Can confirm i was scammed, no refund!
Currie
We March For Macragge and we shall know no fear! Thanks for all the fun and banter Valrak!
Rogal Dorn
Can somebody give me a hand please?
VeryUnwise
Gaslight. Gatekeep. God-Emperor
Drim
If we can make it through today, we can make it through tomorrow. Even the smallest of triumphs are worthy of note. For our humanity, for the Chapter, for the Emperor of Mankind!
Corey McKemy
There's no way you have the proof that you scammed me out of $20. FOR THE LION!
Nick
Do you know what a CD is? CDeez nuts
Jason Shafer
Inveniam viam aut faciam. (I will either find a way or I shall make one.)
Imperial Knight Enjoyer
GLORY TO SHE WHO THRIST!
Games Workshop Legal
Without Prejudice
Warchild
Who?
Captain Settrax
THE FLESH IS WEAK....BUT DEEDS ENDURE
CaptKraken
The Necrons where here.
Joseph G
THE MAN
TNTurbo
May your scams overflow your pockets and your rolls hit the mark! For Dorn and He on Terra!
Zain Haq
Captain Marshal de Boussac,
Discrti dunkwn
He hates me for liking Eldar and Ultramarines. At least I am not an AOS player...or a fifthly gray name. Much love for the Hype you give.
Chris Jones
Pati Virtutem Repugnantes
Roboute Guilliman
This seal is bestowed upon Lieutenant Valrak of the second company of Ultramarines. Courage and Honor brother.
BigWayne
The time for speeches is done.
Ru-Fi-Oh!
Don't ask about Valrak's basement. There's no secret Daemonculaba setup down there.
Protato
The inquisition is watching you through the walls. Walk softly and carry a big gun.
ThePr3t 3nd3r
I came for the banter. Stayed for the foil. But then Peachy got fired.
I am Alpharius
Valraks Only Fans coming soon!
Nathan Cartwright
Crimson fisting my missus
Merch is selling fast!
Check out my merch page for more cool stuff, if it's in stock, its a scam!
Even more scams
Check out My Socials and keep up to date the with Leaks Rumours
